Love to die for
by sapphireLavender
Summary: Jakotsu is oblivious, Bankotsu is not. (Sequel to 'Drop Dead Gorgeous' and 'Piercing Heartbreak'.)


**A/N: I finally got to The Band of Seven arc, so I wrote the final one-shot in this series. I hope it kind of does it justice.**

 **Takes place during The Band of Seven arc, specifically right before episode 118, so before _the_ moment. This is definitely spoilers probably.**

 **Title was, once again, created by Piper Poptato Chisp.**

* * *

There had certainly been a lot of time to think, within the while they had all been resurrected.

Bankotsu had been alone for most of it, though eventually, Kohaku the ninja had returned with his friends. Or, as it felt sometimes and especially recently, friend. As it turned out, he never got a good battle with their opponent, Inuyasha.

The first time he was called away, and the second was no different.

It was a particularly nice day, in fact, it felt too nice. Being so close to the mountain, he felt incredibly sick. It was no different for his comrades, despite the fact they were all human.

Having all the time to think didn't necessarily mean he was able to. It felt difficult to think around the air of the mountain. And aside from that, there was what he was thinking of to begin with.

Admittedly, Bankotsu himself felt quite eager to finish this job, and get away from this mountain. Today, he decided to walk away from it for a while and clear his head.

The more distance, the more he seemed to feel better and it left him with the time to think he required. His second life wouldn't last forever, and he was aware of that. Sometimes, he felt like he should do the things he didn't in his first life. Some things he considered, but one he decided was _still_ a bad idea. And, he figured, would always be.

For some reason, he almost felt like telling Jakotsu more than he had before, especially with Inuyasha around. He didn't really understand what Jakotsu saw in that guy. Inuyasha was hot, though not quite his type. It was unfortunate that he was sure this was an unrequited love between him and Jakotsu.

It was hard to even tell when he fell in love with Jakotsu, it just seemed to have happened. Now, he knew he couldn't ever confess. It didn't stop him from considering the possibility, though.

' _Damn it, why is this so difficult?_ ' He thought. He told himself he'd just leave it as it was already, he shouldn't have thoughts like this. He shouldn't honestly consider confessing...

It was easy to picture, even some words. Even things he'd usually never say to anyone. A number of different reactions came from Jakotsu, and that was the important part.

How Jakotsu would react to something like that. He didn't want to ruin the relationship they had. He trusted Jakotsu more than anyone else, and more than he probably ever trusted anyone before.

They had been friends for years, long before The Band of Seven was formed. He didn't want to risk throwing it away. He didn't want to risk losing Jakotsu over something like this. He thought he had got past this.

It seemed he was wrong, as the thoughts seemed determined to stick around.

He stopped walking at a certain place that looked like a decent place.

It was near a river full of fish with a few flowers lying around, as well as a few bushes of kuchinashi. Bankotsu sat in the grass and watched the fish, and nearby butterflies. Which were later destroyed by a large halberd.

He placed Banryu down and put his hand on the ground, touching the grass.

There was barely anything significant about the area he was in, and somehow, that was the best part if he thought about it. Aside from the flowers he didn't seem interested in.

Bankotsu leaned a bit forward and got back to his thoughts, thinking.

He hated not being able to tell something to Jakotsu. He used to feel like he could trust anything with Jakotsu, but now he didn't know who he could trust with Renkotsu plotting as he was. He noticed, the Band of Seven seemed to have changed since being resurrected.

Motives, goals and the members. He didn't know if that applied to Jakotsu. He always was full of surprises, and that was considered an understatement.

From his sword, which was quite incredible, to his fashion sense and the abilities he rarely even used. Jakotsu was unique in most ways, personality included.

Another surprise turned out to be he had a way to make people fall in love with him, apparently, as Bankotsu learned.

"Hmm." He looked down at the fish, before leaning back, ' _I want to tell him...'_

But he knew he couldn't, and that was frustrating. The fact that he could never tell him was the worst part.

Their friendship had gone for years, to death and then they came back and it remained the same as it did before they died. They came back, and they remained just as they had previously. He wished he could say this was true. Everything was different now, even if he didn't want it to be.

This was their second life, after all, they were resurrected. They had been betrayed and it was questionable on what they would do after this.

After they killed Inuyasha, what would they do? It was only the four of them left, wasn't it? They weren't even the Band of Seven anymore. He was so close in reaching his goal with Banryu, as well as close to killing Inuyasha if he could face him somewhere decent without being called away.

Inuyasha, a half-demon. It seemed to be taking them ridiculously long to get rid of him.

He heard some buzzing before turning to see the poisonous insects, who flew towards him.

"Ah." Bankotsu said aloud, "So Suikotsu's dead, huh?"

So that made it just the three of them, knowing that Ginkotsu had died as well recently. It really seemed as though they should get a new name.

It didn't surprise him that Suikotsu was gone as well now, and he made a note that he should find his remains as well and bury them, as he previously did with Kyoukotsu and Mukotsu.

Minutes passed, even hours, before Bankotsu had even considered moving.

He figured he should go find Jakotsu and talk with him, but he couldn't stop thinking about telling Jakotsu. It seemed when you wanted to stop thinking about something the most, you thought about it more than you would have already.

That was one of the bad parts of thinking, unfortunately, though not the only one.

Bankotsu almost wished he knew someone who knew something about love, that was not Jakotsu, because he knew next to nothing about the concept.

He remembered briefly that he had thought about it before, after he realized he loved his best friend, though now he only vaguely remembered the details, the only one he remembered clearly being that he thought about it and questioned it a lot.

' _If I did tell him, what would happen?_ '

That was the main question, and one he wouldn't be able to answer. There was many different possibilities, and many ways it could go. He didn't even know what he would say if he confessed, he had no clue aside from something really long and cheesy he pictured briefly.

He could say three words, or he could go more in depth. Would three words even be enough? Would they be enough to describe the full feeling?

Did they hold enough power? He wasn't sure. Aside from that, just saying three words in a confession seemed like a bad idea to him. There was many different ways to go with it, and he wasn't sure with one to choose.

He wasn't even sure he should confess in the first place.

' _Why am I even thinking about this?_ ' He thought, ' _I'm not going to do it. I won't ruin our friendship for this.'_

If he did, he wouldn't really have anyone, would he? Renkotsu was going to betray him and the rest were dead. He wasn't even sure if he could trust Jakotsu at this point, even if he did fall in love with him.

It had seemed everyone else had changed since being resurrected, after all. With ever or not he could trust Jakotsu was something he was still unsure of.

He still trusted Jakotsu, of course, as Jakotsu hadn't even really given him a reason not to. He never did.

Bankotsu knew there wasn't anything he could really do about his feelings. If he confessed, he'd ruin everything and if he didn't, nothing would change, even if such a strong feeling was ignored. Somehow, it seemed like the better option.

Jakotsu wouldn't like him back. He was sure about that, even if Jakotsu did flirt with him. It wasn't as though he ever meant anything by it.

No matter how many times he repeated it, it didn't seem his mind took that as an acceptable answer.

He decided to leave his thoughts for a bit to look at the sky. It seemed to be getting later now, he wondered if he should go back.

After all, he did want to talk to Jakotsu, though confessing wasn't plausible.

"Hey, Bankotsu." Jakotsu said.

He turned his head to look at his friend, who was now wearing a yellow kosode with blue flowers on it, as well as a grey scarf instead of his purple one he had previously.

"Jakotsu." Bankotsu replied, standing up, "I wasn't expecting to see you here."

Jakotsu glanced at the flower bushes, "Yeah, what are you doing so far away, Bankotsu? Aren't we supposed to stay near the mountain?"

"I needed a place to think." Bankotsu sat back down, "I can't stand the air of that place."

"The barrier really is stronger, isn't it?" Jakotsu said as he sat down beside him.

"Yeah." Bankotsu agreed, before changing the topic, "I heard the new from the Saimyōshō. Suikotsu didn't make it, huh?"

"Yeah.. It was a pretty sad ending for him." Jakotsu stated, "Oh hey, that reminds me. I've got something for you here, Bankotsu."

Jakotsu placed a jewel shard in this hand, "This is a memento from Suikotsu, a shard from the Sacred Jewel."

Bankotsu looked almost confused at it, "It's for me?"

Jakotsu placed his arms on top of each other as he often did, "What are you talking about? You're the one who told us to hand it over if we got one."

There was many emotions that overflowed, especially trust. He pulled Jakotsu closer to him and put his arm around him, smiling.

"Jakotsu... You're such a good friend!" He moved his hand in an up and down motion, "You're really something Jakotsu, and the only person in the whole world I can trust! Even if you are a bit weird."

Jakotsu started smiling as well, despite the thoughts currently going through his head.

"You really think so?"

They didn't say much until they finished laughing, and eventually, Bankotsu leaned forward and looked at the remainder of the sunset as it continued to set, feeling considerably better than he had before.

From that short moment, Bankotsu knew something he hadn't before.

He knew just how much he could trust Jakotsu.

Somehow, putting it into words didn't say how much it meant to him. There wasn't a word he could describe it with that'd do it justice.

The thought of confessing was still in his mind, and he couldn't help but feel this was the worst time for it to be there. There wasn't anything he could do about it, and it was annoyingly hard to ignore.

This moment he shared only strengthened what he knew, he couldn't destroy this trust. It was hard to believe he even considered it in the first place.

He looked around, specifically at the flower bushes, and realized that they didn't exactly help with his thoughts. He recalled flowers like those in some memories and moments he shared with Jakotsu previously. Sometime after they first started travelling together, the hair pin and after they met Mukotsu. They used to see them a lot more, he recalled.

Nothing around the area was of any help, of course, and his thoughts were the most unhelpful thing in this situation.

He remembered, he was watching a sunset like this one when he first realized that he loved Jakotsu. He looked at Jakotsu, his friend. The guy didn't seem to notice, as he looked at the sunset, looking kind of uninterested.

Bankotsu didn't remember if he was uninterested that time, as he mostly remembered that day being the big realization. The one that he'd be stuck with forever, thinking about and unable to do anything about it.

There was many words he could say, that he wanted to. But at the moment, he only seemed to be able to sit in silence.

Jakotsu turned to look at his friend, hand on his knee, and just recalled the moment they had.

It wasn't uncommon for Bankotsu to display affection. It almost seemed odd, just being friends, sometimes. Jakotsu had accepted that he had to keep his feelings a secret, he was a good liar.

He had been surprised at the action, and sometimes, he was surprised Bankotsu didn't seem to know.

If he did know, he wouldn't do things like that, would he? It was sometimes surprising Bankotsu didn't noticed, but he was quite naive sometimes, or perhaps just oblivious. He would never look that closely at his type, or take his flirting seriously. Sometimes, it was questionable if he even noticed the flirting.

He never really commented on it, thought sometimes it seemed he did indirectly.

Jakotsu looked around at the area, watching the river reflect the sky. The reflection was beautiful, and he could see the fish swimming around in the water. It wasn't interesting, as the flowers around them were much more interesting. The kuchinashi, he recognized from when they were younger, though he didn't think much of them.

He looked at Bankotsu, who looked in thought, and smiled.

Jakotsu was unaware as to what Bankotsu was thinking about, and that was perhaps for the best, as Bankotsu was currently thinking many different things and attempting not to.

Somehow, it seemed the two both had similar thoughts in the moment, some more intense.

' _I can't tell him._ ' Bankotsu told himself.

Jakotsu was having similar thoughts, ' _I don't want to ruin this trust.._ '

He pushed the thought out of his mind. He had already decided he wouldn't say anything, and he made it this far. He wasn't going to ruin it now, especially after what Bankotsu said.

There was silence for many minutes, the sun getting closer and closer to setting entirely.

It seemed ridiculous, the thoughts going through Bankotsu's head.

It was a good time, a good place to do it. Here they were, in their second life. Together, and the trust felt far stronger than before. It seemed neither of them had really changed that much since being resurrected, unlike the other members.

He never had a moment like this in his first life, a time so perfect. It almost made him wonder why he had yet to say the words.

Bankotsu realized, he just seemed to have convinced himself to confess. He didn't want to, he couldn't.

It was supposed to be three words, but he knew if he said any it'd be more than that. There wasn't just a few words he'd say if he could.

But he couldn't say any, he couldn't confess. He felt speechless at the moment, as well as warm.

"Oo-aniki?" Jakotsu asked after a while.

"Yeah?" He turned to his friend, the light starting to disappear and fade.

"Do you think we should be heading back now?" He asked, curious, "It _is_ getting dark."

"Huh, maybe we should.." Bankotsu thought aloud, his heart feeling heavy. This was his only chance, and he couldn't seem to do it. He looked at Jakotsu and a million thoughts appeared, unsure of which ones to focus on or if to ignore them all.

"Jakotsu..." He started, "I wanted to tell you something."

"Hmm?"

He turned to look at Bankotsu, and he looked just as he usually did. His hair tied up with that hairpin, the scarf over the kosode with the one side as he had it. Beautiful, gorgeous, pretty.. The words he usually used to describe him.

Words seemed to be an issue at the moment, as Bankotsu couldn't help but feel speechless. It was hard to put it into words.

The trust, the love... The latter which seemed stranger the more he thought about it. All the years they spent together, fighting. How he turned to his friend that day when he formed The Band of Seven. Every small moment, small things like hairpins and the kuchinashi flowers present during them. There just wasn't any way to put it all into words, to describe it.

To describe the feeling. Such a strong feeling, passionate and whatnot. Loyalty, trust and the many things he loved about Jakotsu, all mere extensions to loving Jakotsu himself.

He had thought for most of the day about it, yet all the words he had prepared suddenly disappeared in the moment. None of them had been good enough, anyway, or anything he could ever see himself saying to anyone.

Here they were, after all those years, in their second life and what seemed to be the perfect place.

They had been together so long, he could only hope one thing in the moment. Even if the feelings were unrequited, he hoped it wouldn't ruin everything as he feared.

It was hard to say anything, even feeling brave, but he did so anyway.

"Jakotsu," He tried to speak in a soft tone, "You're really something. And the only person in the world I can trust."

"You said that before." Jakotsu pointed out.

"I did, cause you still don't understand."

Jakotsu looked at Bankotsu, confused.

Somehow, in the moment, he didn't need words. He had a better alternative.

Bankotsu leaned forward, closer, and kissed Jakotsu. Within a few seconds, he stopped and simply looked at his friend.

"Ah," Jakotsu said, "Now I understand."

The two, more or less, embraced without second thoughts. The sun had set and the moon was the main source of light in the scene. It was almost as though all thoughts had vanished, as though they were acting without them.

It was hard to believe it was even real, after all the time they had told themselves it was unrequited, all the time they were sure of it.

But here they were, in their second life, with a chance they never got before. An opportunity that had been nearly perfect, the place and all. A time where Bankotsu wasn't at all busy with being a leader, as he really had no one to lead anymore.

The two would kiss, in various places, while the moon was getting higher in the sky.

When the stars started to come out, the two lied in the grass together, hardly centimeters apart.

Many things would change now, and the path they had taken today was undoubtedly for the better, perhaps in multiple ways. They didn't need to do anything else in the moment, though that didn't mean they wouldn't.

They could look into each other's eyes for a while before they would kiss, and as they cuddled in the grass displaying affection and love the best they could.

It seemed this was the best ending and option for the both of them, as they embraced before they smooched once more.

They didn't leave until sunrise.

* * *

 **A/N: This one was probably the most frustrating to write.. I wasn't at all sure how the confession would work, so I tortured my sibling for help. They also helped with the flower. The gardenia flower (kuchinashi) means 'Secret love' or 'Crush', I think.**

 **I don't really like how this one turned out that much, so I hope it's okay. It might be kind of cheesy(?)**

 **Since this basically takes place during episode 118, the outcome would be very different in this fic, and definitely would benefit them more.**

 **I hope you all have a good day.**


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